The Mail's version, Britain paying illegal migrants in Calais £1,700 to return home, is co-written by our old friend James Slack.
Illegal immigrants queuing to enter Britain are being offered 'bribes' worth £1,700 to return home instead.
The Express goes for You pay for migrant sneaks to go home, which claims:
Migrants trying to sneak into Britain illegally from France are to be offered £1,700 of taxpayers’ money and a plane ticket to return home in a new scheme that is set to cost millions.
The Star's Illegals get £1.7K bribe to go home goes with:
Migrants queueing to enter the UK from France are to be offered £1,700 of taxpayers’ money and a free flight home.
While the Sun's Migrants ‘paid off’ said:
Illegal migrants queuing up in France to enter Britain are set to be offered £1,700 each and a free flight home.
All of which clearly point to one thing - the British taxpayer is going to pay £1,700 to illegal imigrants.
But then the Telegraph tweaks the story a little, but rather crucially early on in its article:
Under the scheme, migrants will be offered a plane ride home as well as resettlement assistance and retraining when they get there. The French government is also offering 2,000 euros (£1,724) in cash.
Hmm. Really - the British taxpayer won't be paying that £1,700 after all? No. As anyone who bothers to read to the end of the Mail and Express stories will learn:
A spokesman for the UK Border Agency said: 'The Government does not give cash handouts to migrants in Calais, and the bill for these flights is met by the French government.
'We are contributing with the French to the Global Calais Project, which persuades those barred from entering Britain to go home, which will ultimately save the British taxpayer from the cost of enforcing a removal.
So how does 'we don't give cash and are not paying for the flights' turn into 'the British taxpayer is paying £1,700 and for flights'?